Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives.
Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.                       John 14:27

Shalom

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Name: Jonathan Toh
Birthday: 17/01/84
Occupation: Servant of God
Church: Yishun Methodist Mission

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Monday, April 24, 2006

Title of the day: The repairing process begins...

"Seems like your ship is in a bad shape captain.." a soft and gentle voice eco behind the sadden face. As the captain of the ship turn his view away from his broken, near-to-be sink ship, he saw a man, with beard, wearing a construction helmet and dress in a shipyard uniform stood behind him. "Hi" the men greeted him with a smile... "we met again captain". I was shock.. I could not speak of a word... guilt and disappointment suddenly been overwhelming the whole body.. as if it has taken control over me.

"Pls dont feel guilt or disappointment... I can understand how u are feeling now.." say the man... "ya.." I replied.. "so I guess the beam of light that has guided us to this here is from you..." "yes.. that's right.." the man replied. "Not to worry captain, I will be taking charge and overseening the full repair of your ship. We have the fineness technicians and engineers that will guarantee yr ship to be fully repair" he pointed around the shipyard "we will fully armor your ship too so that it will be able stronger then before..." " let me explain to you how the process will be like.." the man said with a smile..

The noisy sound of machines, tools hammering the metal plates fill the whole repair dock, technicians, engineers, harbour workers busy with their own areas of work, some repairing the badly damage outer surface of the ship, some help to carry out the dead bodies of ship crews whom have die during the heavy attacks, others concentrate on replacing the ship body parts... The repairing has begun.

As the beard man was walking with me around the ship, explaining to the captain about the procedures of the repairing work... my foot pace stop.. I crunch my fist.. looking at the floor of the harbor with a wrinkle face "why... why is it you are helping me now... I didnt listen to your advice and went on to do what I want to do... and yet you are still willing to help me?" That men stop his explaination, look at me with his usual smile and said "Dont worry... you are save here" He walk near to me and give me a big hug. Tears fill my eyes and flow like a opening tap... I whisper an apologie to his ears, he remove his hug and added on " Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as others gives. Do not let heart be troubled and do not afraid" "not to worry.. your ship will be repair in no time and it will be stronger as before... trust me.."

As he was about to turn around and continue where he stop, he said "I will let you know when you are ready to move out.. this time, yr ship will be able to withstand any storms or even enemy attacks.. I promise" with a big wide smile showing his pure white teeth... he continue his explanation of the repair procedures ....

I shine in Jesus | 10:59 pm


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Wednesday, April 19, 2006

Title of the day: what is the true meaning of breaking, moulding and using by God?

today I receive and learn what is the true meaning of been break by God... it is terrible... really terrible.. no one ever want to hv such feeling of terrible hurst and pain in you.. the pain that is beyond what u can bear... but.. strangly.. I too feel a peace... a peace that is beyond my understanding... it is like when u hv been broken up into tiny pics.. to be re-mould by God again... not knowing what is the future lay ahead of you...

The desire of your heart... that has been completely smash.. those prayers, hopes and desires.. hv been completely smash... by God... I shouted at him " WHY LORD!! this is not the Lord that I have know!!! why must this thing happen to me!?! Why are u doing this to me?!!" the unexplainable pain and confusion.... why... is the only thing i can should to God...

but what about this special peace in me? could it be that I am already numb? no feeling anymore? or God is protecting and comforting me at period of time... Father.. this can only ans by you....

Heavenly Father, so sorry that I cant help to blame myself for the things that happen.. but Lord if u allow it to happen.. u must hv yr purpose.. I dont know.. father, I only ask that may you allow me to know what is the purpose u hv for me... help me to understand those things tat I dont understand.. speak to me in what ever way u pleases.. I am like a broken jar now... into many pics... if is part of this moulding process I pray that Lord I will feel the victory again... Lord I really wana hug u and cry out to you... no words can explain what I am going through emotionally.. no one knows... only u know... father I pray that u will remind me to be still and know that you are God.. in Jesus name I pray.. Amen.


I shine in Jesus | 11:20 pm


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Monday, April 17, 2006

Title of the day: Is it the end? or just the begining....

Heavenly father, I thank you for the talk me and veron had with stanley.. although things turn out not what i pray and hope for, but Lord I want to trust yr will for us... Father I thank you for all the sweet and fun time I hv with veron, Lord even we have come to a conclucion that we will re-start off as friends... Father I still want to ask and pray for veron, I know she still has alot of issues that are troubling her, her past that is hindering her, Lord I want I want to break any bondages in her from her past happening in JESUS NAME! I pray that although she is still not ready into a relationship, I ask father may you build up our friendships... and I pray one day, may it be yr will that both of us will be together again.... Father, may your peace and comfort be with us... father I will be waiting for her.. waiting for her to be ready... to re-accpect this me and allow me to be with her again... thank you God... I pray all this in Jesus most powerful name... Amen...

I shine in Jesus | 9:05 pm


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Saturday, April 01, 2006

Title of the day : Aftermath of a storm...

it has not been easy for them i will say this past few weeks... was really going through a stormy period... Alot of things happen... one of it is that both myself and veron went through this dark storm... conflicts happen between both of us... and is quite a big one.. well I guess God has a purpose for this to happen.. hey which couple dont quarrel or fight... this is how they are able to get to know one another better ya...

Everyday was a tough day... but I thank God that I have God on myside that when ever I felt heavy hearted I will hide myself in a corner and cry out to him... it is him who hv given me the strength to go through this period.. I also thank God for one of my colleauge whom she has been very supportive to me.. felt a bit bad when I always trouble her.. but hey.. must make full use of God's blessing around me mah.. haha no lah just kidding.. but I thank God that everything has settle between both of us and I believe God has a great plan for both of us.. =)

Heavenly Father... I thank you for all thing things been sorted out between us.. Father I ask for the blood of Jesus to cover our relationship, father indeed sometime there is so much miscommunication between both of us and this give the evil one to allow to attack us but Lord right now I wana tell the evil one straight in the face that they hv no right in our relationship cause Jesus Christ is taking charge in our relationship and Christ has victory over the evil one.. I bind any evil spirit that tends to destory our relationship in the name of Lord Jesus... Father I ask that may your holy spirit lead me and veron and guide us in our relationship... thank you father... In Jesus name.. Amen..

I shine in Jesus | 10:48 pm


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